AboveTheRayne

A man who cries without embarrassment, who rejoices with tears. A man who caresses you when you need it the most, who shows how much he cares. A man who provides and protects, this is the man you honor and will never regret…

I smile while writing these words, remembering my youth. All the girls gathering around, gazing at handsome boys. Laughing and giggling, dreaming… all wondering what it would be like to be their girlfriend, basing everything on “LOOKS”. Mom’s and Dad’s you needed to be grooming your young ladies long before the teenage years. All it takes is one good looking jock to cause years of pain. It may seem cute to some to see their children playing out adult roles and you think, O don’t worry it won’t go far. I shake my head when I say that as I’ve seen over the years many young girls who became pregnant.

True story…At age thirteen, Sheila is pregnant by the good looking boy down the street. Now where did cute go. Some parents need to take their heads out of the sand. The first stupid question a parent asks after a child becomes pregnant is…how did that happen? The school for gosh sake was offering to conduct sex education classes. When Sheila came home with a letter asking for your signature, you said no. Why I asked…We have to protect our children from that, when the time comes, I will teach them. Lady… the time came and went and now you have a baby on the way and who will care for this child. How does one hold back on teaching a child, preparing them so they know when and what to say “NO” too.

You left your daughter wide open, you didn’t take her to the doctor to arrange protection in case the act took place. No of course not, and I’ll tell you why…You said…My little Sheila is still a virgin, she doesn’t need protection. I wonder if that was the same Sheila we saw emerging from Tommy J’s house when Mom and Dad were not home. So when you ask the
question…how did that happen, you should have a basket full of answers.

We really need to think long and hard when raising our young ladies. Answer all questions, do not hold back, if they don’t find out from you, they’ll find out perhaps the hard way. I remember when I was about 14 years old, this is so ridiculous, I don’t even want to say it but my Aunt had a big belly again. Finally one day, I asked her why her belly was so big. She smiled at me and told me, you come back when your 15 and I’ll tell you. You know, this seems really strange to write but it’s true.

I made the decision years later to answer all questions my children asked of me. Now my husband would not take part in that but I had no problem in that regard. I see girls today, who look to be age 17 or 18, in fact they are 12 & 13 with full make-up, fancy nails, high heel shoes. Personally I think this invites trouble especially if your girls are not taught properly. You’re setting them up for something they will not know how to deal with. Back in the day to be a virgin into your twenties wasn’t such a big deal. Now to be a virgin at age 15 is amazing. Young girls are losing their virginity at age 10 and 11. I heard the other day on TV, a young girl gave birth at age 11.

We really need to take charge in bringing forth young ladies who love themselves, who know they are worthy, who refuse to settle, girls who will set goals, know what they want out of life and be able to focus on that.
Girls who realize they are not entertainment for young or old men. Girls who know their power and understand they are the ones who bring forth the miracles of life. Remember this girls, if you decide not to bring children into this world, there will be no children. God gave this to you, He gave you the gift of bringing forth the miracles in this life, the future comes through you… Know it! You make all decisions, you decide when that will happen so only “YOU” are in charge.

Young ladies you need to learn to step away from jealousy and stand with your sisters helping to empower each other, to love and care for each other. You need to form a chain of love, caring and protecting each other. I’m not suggesting that you segregate yourselves from boys, of course not, but you must know how to behave properly. Learning to use the word “NO” is key and use it with strength, “NO” means “NO”, not yes like some young men think…

Right now the world is changing and it’s changing quickly for the worse not the better. What we don’t need are more children to add to orphanages, to foster homes or to the inside of wrecked cars in the arms of the homeless.

I encourage you to get your education, have self love, know that you are number one. Know how to protect yourself, stay out of harms way, listen intently and be aware. Above all, realize that your body is a temple and you should not settle but expect to get the best out of this life. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about any of that because believe me, you deserve the best. Life is not going to be easy but with patience, it will be what you want it to be. I love you my little sisters with all my heart…

Melvina Germain